Play that funky music

There's one element of my wedding that I started planning long before I got engaged - the music. Being able to soundtrack an entire day is a particularly thrilling prospect for me - after all, up until now the only event I had planned a set list for was my funeral.

But enough doom and gloom. The big day will also be an exciting opportunity to give people a musical education. From the ethereal soundtrack of the ceremony to the party pieces of the evening, I have high ambitions for my wedding to act as the ultimate mix tape (long live the cassette).

One problem though: guests just want to enjoy themselves, rather than receive a "musical education" from someone pretentious enough to use the words "musical education" (I'll have a word with myself later).

It's not just me getting married, of course, and D's musical favourites will have to get fair representation on the turntables as well. Unfortunately, this has made drawing up the set list a struggle of difficult-second-album proportions. There is, of course, some overlap in our respective choices (we have about 15 duplicate CDs at home), but we also both have incredibly eclectic taste. As evidence of this, you only have to check out one evening's worth of our Spotify listening, which will run seamlessly from Goldfrapp, through Bowie, on to Dubstar, past Hall & Oates, with a detour to N.W.A, on through Deee-Lite and ending with the Les Misérables soundtrack for a theatrical climax to the (usually drunken) evening.

We both like bands people have never heard of - The Research and Robocop Kraus anyone? - and we both also have our own shameful guilty pleasures (Celine Dion and Ultravox - and no, I won't reveal whose is whose). Unfortunately, it's impossible to dance to Celine and Robocop Kraus are unlikely to get the uninitiated up and grooving. On top of that, it's hard to find a DJ who is likely to carry The Bee Gees and Death in Vegas in the same record bag. And if we did get our way, we would probably be the only people dancing anyway, while all the guests sit around the edges of the room, like countless wallflowers at a high school prom.

The fact is most people just want to have a good time, which means entertaining them with the usual list of wedding classics. Come On Eileen, Livin' On A Prayer, Dancing Queen, YMCA, I Think We're Alone Now - you know the drill - ending with a slow dance to Adele. However, while I might not know what table decorations reflect our personalities, I'm certain a soundtrack featuring Westlife doesn't.

Luckily, we are on our way to a solution. We have picked our three songs for the ceremony, are close to booking the DJ and have pencilled in two friends to do a guest DJ spot. With that many cooks in the musical kitchen, the broth should be well and truly mixed, with something for everyone, including a few of the usual crowd-pleasers at the end of the night.

And if any of them play Robbie Williams' Angels, there'll be hell to pay!